Bored....

They say an empty mind is a devils workshop ... Couldn’t agree more ... I quit my job last week ... I would be lying if I said I had be working my ass off ever since I came here, but after I put in my papers, even that little stream of work which came my way dried up ... Normally I would be quite pleased with this development, but after a week of sleeping at my desk, making personal phone calls to all my friends and chatting all day long, I am starting to feel a lil bored...

I am hopeless when it comes to entertaining myself. During my class 10th break, I got a couple of pigeons ...and I made them a wooden cage... myself... It was quite a piece of carpentry given I didn’t have any professional help ... Neways; my dad got a lil concerned when I started talking to the birds... One day I was informed that they just flew away as someone had left the cage open ...yeah right...

The summer after class 12th, I used my spare time to race my dads car and scooter ... since I couldn’t find anyone to race against, I would time myself from the club to my home which was a good 7 km run ... I know its really sad, but then its not my fault that all my friends were sissies ... On one of these super fast runs, I overtook a really slow moving car... turns out my dad was in it on his way home... Spent the rest of the summer on my cycle ... And they wonder why Kartikeyen doesn’t win ... I bet its coz his dad wouldn’t let him drive fast...

Graduated in the year 2001... Those were gloomy days for the IT industry ... Had my joining postponed by a month... which meant 3 months at home ... Obviously my folks were quite concerned ... Most of all my Sis ... not a day went by without her asking me when I would be out of "her home" ... P and I spent a fortune on Snooker that summer ... and we got pretty good at it ... (PS: Marvin - I let you win in Goa... I really did)...
When I wasn’t burning my dads hard earned money on pool tables , I would be in cyber cafes visiting certain discussion forums discussing the finer details of carpet bombing certain areas of the world I thought would serve better as water reservoirs ... It was also the time I came up with my path breaking paper for the economic development of Western Rajasthan ...
Some parts of this theory were a lil too revolutionary as they involved turning Jaiselmer into a port city ... When I told my dad about it , he asked me to pack my bags and go on a trip away from home ...P and I decided to go to Himanchal ... Awesome trip that was ... I remember us getting down from the bus in the middle of nowhere at 2 in the morning... Pitch darkness, not soul in sight and all we could hear was jackals ... Never been so shit scared in my life ... (PS: what the two of us were doing in God forsaken place like that is a different story altogether)...

Like I said, keeping myself entertained is not something I am particularly good at... the last time I got really bored , I started writing a blog , and look how that turned out ... Neways as always , I have decided to make the most of what I have ... Over the last few days , I have been thinking of ways to stop myself from going bonkers .. . If you ever find yourself in my position , you are more than welcome to use them... They work for me ...

1. Tape your neighbor’s phone switch with a cello tape... So when the phone rings and he picks up the receiver, it doesn’t stop ringing ... would drive him nuts before he figures out what’s happening...

2. Call up your bank and ask them for a personal loan ...5 mins into the discussion, tell them that you also have a 15 lac education loan... after another 5 mins , tell them that you have quit your job and are not in the mood for working anymore and thats why you need the loan .. (I did that this afternoon ... I wish I had recorded the entire conversation)...

3. Find out all the sites that websense doesn’t block, but you think should be blocked and inform the network security deptt about them... Wouldn’t make you the most popular guy in the office, but how do you care... you are out of there anyways...

4. Get a novel to office... The more adventurous would get a Daniel Steele or Shobha De... and a dozen Oranges... If the novel doesn’t drive your boss crazy, the smell of oranges would ... This one was suggested by G... I never got a chance to try it out coz oranges aren’t in season ... But I’m definitely doing it when I quit my next job.

5. Tell everyone how great your new job is. Tell them that you would be required to travel to Hawaii every month for work and that your new company is giving you a car, a fully furnished house and a secretary in a short skirt ... For best effects; tell this to a group of IIM grads who’ve never seen an office before in their lives... Trust me those suckers would buy anything ;-)

I still have a couple of days to kill , so if I get any more Ideas , Ill let you guys know ... Do let me know if you have any .. I’m really dying in here...