Fusion

Lemme start this post with a lil Wiki Lesson on the origins of Ford Prefect-
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"Ford is a good friend of the main character, an ordinary Earthman named Arthur Dent who has known him for several years and believes him to be "an out of work actor from the town of Guildford" in Surrey. However, Ford is actually an alien from a small planet somewhere in the vicinity of Betelgeuse, and had originally only come to Earth to do some research for an article he was writing on it for the Guide.
Although Ford had taken great care to blend into Earth society, he had "skimped a bit on his preparatory research", and thought that the name "Ford Prefect" would be "nicely inconspicuous". Adams later clarified in an interview that Ford "had simply mistaken the dominant life form". The Ford Prefect was, in fact, a line of inexpensive automobiles manufactured in the United Kingdom in the 1950s."
~ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ford_Prefect_(character)
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It not common for people who haven’t read the Book to mistakenly refer to the character as Ford Perfect which is quite irritating actually ... Unfortunately Ford stopped making the model a long time back else I would have gladly bought myself one just as a tribute to Douglas Adams ... So I went ahead and did the next best thing ... Bought myself a Ford Fusion
Now as much as I would like people to believe that I bought a ford car just because its Maker shares its name with my fictional Blog pseudonym , that’s not really the case ... To be perfectly honest , I was quite happy with my Hyundai Accent ... Its a neat ride ... But after lugging it around Mumbai traffic for 15000 Km , I got a lil bored of it ...
I bought my first car back in 2004... It was a 10 year old Maruti 800 which had done over 80,000 KMs ... thats twice around the equator!!! I really loved that car ... So much that once me and my rommie decided to take it for a "quick spin" on the Mumbai-Pune expressway ... Now that was a seriously humiliating experience ... The damn rust bucket topped out at 90 KMPH
... and while doing so shaked and veered like a freakin blender on wheels ... One scary ride that turned out to be... Neways ,after I got an admit in ISB , I deduced that owning that piece of shit would seriously jeopardize my image on campus ... I knew my chances of being the guy with the "Axe Effect" were quite slim ... But still an antique run down Navy blue Maruti 800 was not a handicap I could play with ... Sold it off for an amount which barely paid for my laptop at ISB ...

Well that was then ... Life has been kind to me the last few years... I am really looking forward to my new ride ... The best part about a Ford Fusion is that Hardly anybody has it ... Some people tell me that’s not a good thing and in fact it implies that there something seriously wrong with the Car ... Well I didn’t find anything wrong ... at a 100 BHP , it charges like a rhino in heat ... Its built solid like a Tank ... The tires are absolutely Huge ... and you sit so high up , you almost feel like an evil king looking down at his lowly miserable subjects ... All in all , good fun .. Planning to take it on the expressway this weekend ... and this time , I wont be driving on the left most lane ...

Workshop 101

Back in engineering college ,of all the courses the one I hated most was Engineering workshop... My fellow mechanical engineers would sympathise with me on this ... The workshop was an old diaplated building which was hot and dusty and full of old sadist instructors who just loved screwing the happiness out of all students ...Bastards seemed to have a special disliking towards yours truely in particular coz I would never wear the mandatory all Khakhi Uniform to the workshop ...To be honest Id rather let go of some internal marks than walk around campus dressed like a watchman ...Last I heard , a couple of the old buggers had croaked ...Prolly some 4th year grad shoved a welding electrode up their asses ... But even more than the instructors ,What I hated most about the worksop was that screeching noise of metal rubbing metal in the fitting shop ... I still get jitters just thinking about the time I cut through a 4 inch plate of Mild Steel with a Hack saw ... 1 hour and 3 blades it took that fine Rajasthan summer afternoon ... Dont get me wrong here ... Its not like I am a wuss who dosent like to get his hands dirty...I always was a hands on person .. Now I might not be able to overhaul an engine , but I can change a flat tire or clean a spark plug or fix a busted elctric fuse ...Something which strangely a lot of guys I know cant ...Personally I think not being able to deal with even such basic handywork is just Gay ...
You must be wondering what reminds me of my experiences in the Mechanical Engineering Workshop. Well it all started when Mrs Prefect took me to Good Earth ... For the uninformed , Good Earth is a Home Deco store where you get seriously overpriced Junk in the name of designer furniture ... There was this log of wood which was supposed to be a coffee table ... Just a log of wood with a Glass top ....being sold for 20000/-!!! The "Designer" in all probability just hacked it off from a fallen tree by the road side...As much as Mrs Prefect just loved all the crap there , I thought the prices were more outrageous than what Vijay Mallaya paid for that useless loser team of His ...Neways , one arguement led to another and before I knew it , I was sworn to make a coffee table out of my own two hands using the "extensive Training" I got those 4 long years of my Undergraduation ... Fortunately ,just as I was wondering how I would get this mega Wodden foot out of my mouth ,my firm staffed me on a Project in Bangalore ... And I was off to the garden city away from that evil smile Mrs Prefect has every time she gets me cornered and also from that Strange huge hammer which I dont even know where she got from !!! Not that I couldnt have made a stupid wodden Table ... I could have made it ...
Neways , coming to my stint in Bangalore , its been O.K ... Personally I think this is the most over hyped city in the country ... the weather here has been killing ... May be not as disguesting as back home in Mumbai , but not pleasent by any standards either ... The traffic is horrible (I say that despite being a Mumbai resident) ... and the autowallas are fuking assholes who never want to go where you want to ...Also ,the much talked about pub culture in Bangalore was quite a let down ... Basically these so called pubs are just drinking joints full of wierd ass software engineers with their dirty beards and dishevelled clothes and cheap floaters...May be these wierdos are also the reason behind the total and complete absence of any good looking women at these places ...Not to mention that the Bangaluru night life rocks on all the way till 11 in the night!!!!Basically I am extremely disappointed by this city ...But I guess I am just being grumpy coz I am a lil home sick
The good part is the assignment I am working on ... My client is one of the largest beer Manufacturer in the World ;-)... and the office is right next to a Brewery ... I was really looking forward to stuffing my face with the beer straight from the VAT (Like Homer Simpson did at the Duff factory) ... Unfortunately ,I was told that that only happens in cartoons ... Not the first time I heard that one ...
PS: I know I havent been doing a good job of updating this useful informative blog ... Will try to be more regular ... Provided Mrs Prefect forgets all about that Coffee table...

What Happened

I got a bunch of mails asking what I posted and then deleted and why I deleted it .... For those who missed the action, here is what happened-
Well it all started like it usually starts ... A postponed meeting meant I had nothing to do for the first half of yesterday resulting in me having way too much time to write a Blog post ... Which was about the lack of General awareness and knowledge in an average Mumbaikar... Unfortunately someone emailed the link to the entire batch of a B-School and before I know it , there were these deranged psycho B-Grads all over my blog ... Now I know the post wasnt all motherhood and apple pie , but I had no idea how badly these guys would get their knickers in a twist ... Now the last thing I need is a bunch of KIDS telling me how to write a blog , do my job or live my life... But then this is a public domain so I couldn't exactly ask them to shove their advices up where the sun dont shine ... So I decided to delete the post instead before a bunch of MNS workers burn my effigy in front my my apptt ( which would be quite awesome , but the building society woulf probably throw me out for it) ... Neways , my sitemeter tells me they are gone and looks like its safe to post it back again ....Only problem is that I didnt save it :-(...
And guys ... I went to a B-School too (Ranked 20th in the world might I add) ... I know the pressure you guys are under ... Pressure to show off , sound profound , seem cool , get laid ... Unfortunately This blog can not help you achieve any of it ... Trust me ... I write the damn thing ...