In continuation with my placement preps, I thought this would be a good time to finally figure out an ideal job for me. Given the electives I have taken till now, I have the option to major in Finance , marketing , Operations and Leadership & change management!!!. Of course by the end of this term, I will have to choose 2 among them. A few days back, a partner with diamond cluster in his talk mentioned that the best way to figure out your ideal job is to imagine a day in your life at your job. If its something you can see yourself enjoying , go for it.
So here goes nothing---
What if I join….
Consulting –
Day 1-
Boss – Welcome aboard Mr. Ford… Glad you could join us …
Ford – Thanks… hey could you ask the house keeping guys to clean up my desk … there’s like a Ton of paper there that I guess the guy before left…. I can’t even put my dogs pictures on my desk...
Boss – Ford … that paperwork is for you … Its your first assignment… We need you to find out 10 year projected sales of rubber bands in the country… You have the data for every single latex item ever produced since independence… regress them against each other, make a few models , verify them against every parameter from historical data and project the sales … Easy Peasy ..
Ford – Ooooo.Kkkkk ..Ill get cracking on it right away. You shall have your model by next month.
Boss – Actually I would need it by Monday..
Ford – But today’s Friday …
Boss – I know
Ford – Gulp..
5 Years later –
Boss – Ford Welcome back from Uganda… How was the trip ?
Ford – It was good … They should be selling a lot of rubber bands there now ..
Boss – Excellent …. So how are things at home .. hows the wife and Kids ?
Ford – Dunno .. last I saw them was in the summer of 2008 … Thanks for reminding me ..I wonder if they’ve come back from the ride …
Boss – What ride ??
Ford – Well the missus said she was taking the kids out for a drive… It was kindda strange coz she took the T.V ,furniture and even the dog with her…
Boss – Hmmm ….lets go for a walk shall we…
That’s not too bad , but may be I should consider alternate options as well …
What if I join-
Banking-
Day 1 – Welcome Mr Ford.. I know its your first day and everything, but we prefer all bankers to wear ebony Black suits. I am afraid your florescent blue suit would need to go..
Ford – Really …. O.K
Boss – So Ill leave you with the training deptt now. After you finish your induction , youll undergo a basic training in trading, followed by a refresher course in fraud and risk management , then youll be trained on Mergers and Acquisitions. So see you in 6 months.
Ford – But Ive learnt all that at ISB ..
Boss – Id rather not comment on that .
5 Years later –
Judge – Ford Prefect… you have been charged with single handedly bankrupting an entire hedge fund by misleading them into dead investments. How do you plead?
Ford – Not guilty your honour..
Judge – Not Guilty !!!! You made them buy stocks a blind monkey wouldn’t touch…
Ford – In my defense your honor, my recommendations were based on solid analytical research and robust valuation methodologies. I just made a few errors in calculating the present value of investments.
Judge – What did you estimate the hedge fund would gain on your portfolio?
Ford - $2 million your honors
Judge – and what was the correct return estimate ??
Ford - $20 million … in loss your honor.
Judge – It is the opinion of this court that Ford Prefect is a threat to the entire banking structure of this country. Thus I shall accept the Finance Ministers request and sentence you to 7 years in prison. Put him in the west wing of Tihar .. those guys haven’t had anyone “new” in a long time.
Ford – ouch…
This doesn’t look very promising either …May be I shall get into good ol marketing..
Marketing –
Boss – Glad you could join us Ford… Looking forward to working with you..
Ford – Thanks … Hey I was the last person without a job on campus, so I took this offer without knowing what this company was about . What exactly do I do here ??
Boss – eh??? Well we make a product .. and U need to sell it..
Ford – Cool … so whats the product ??
Boss – Toilet Brushes …
Ford – ohooooh
5 years later –
Boss – waaasssup Ford .. hey something in your office stinks ..
Ford – That would be me sir .. Just back from my daily market rounds. I took a team of new sales men out to teach door to door selling… Had to give 34 demos. You know people actually look forward to our salesmen coming to their houses and giving demos of our product.
Boss – Great .. so how many brushes did u sell ??
Ford – 2..
Boss – Hmm.. can you please step into my office …u better sit down for this..
Ford – Shit ….
Very exciting options all of them …cant make up my mind…Decisions Decisions …
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12 comments:
Hey..U didn't even consider ur own past experience from IT ..If nothing works .. Reboot machine and log on to IT ;)...DM-lalloo and PM-C-Shah will embrace you with both their hands and legs :))))...Ab hum tumhe kabhi nahi jaane denge :)))
You know who ;)
Dude ... If lalloo and C-Shah see me , they wont be using their hands and legs to embrace me ..
brilliant writing! keep the cool stuff flowing. even if u r drunk, ask someone else to keep ur hands off the delete buttons. u have no business to take ur blog off as u had tried it once.
keen to know what would happen if you joined an IT company.
cheers
See now by public demand u must tell us what would happen if u joined the IT industry..
You know who , again :)
Ford!!! Not fair... i was just thinking life is going to be a hell of a fun after i do a MBA....Looks like my IT job is better than anything you described coz even my PM and DM don't exactly know what to do...oops hope they don't read your blog...jus kidding..
Anyway brilliantly written as always. keep posting more of this...
May be you can also touch upon what happens if you want to start your company and what happens if you get in to a design company(Thunderbird knowledge)...
-Pavan
Gentlemen ,
This imagining stuff isnt exactly working out for me ... Looks like no matter what I chose to do , I either end up bankrupt , or in jail or an asylum or all of them .
Id rather not continue with this.
Mogambo dookhi hua ;) ...
UKW
Dude,
I like amits line of thought...what abt alternative professions??
Anyways....I think you voice a lot of our thoughts (mine at least) and makes you wonder why you ever cam to do this MBA in the 1st place!!!
I guess it wont be al that bad...see we are already primed for all kinds of punishment after our life @ ISB
am so upset with you I could slap you. But am pleased that blogspot's 'technical glitch' has been resolved.
WTF ... Now Im getting threatning comments on my blog ... The 'List' is growing by the day ... Wonder if Ill survive till graduation...
Neways Anonymous could you please identify yourself and tell me what I have done to piss you off...
Mr Prefect! You will never work on the same assignment for five years in Consulting, nor you would be calculating PVs in hedge funds or selling in a Marketing role. Believe, that one year has not been enough for you. I think now you know where you can be once you passout - back to school.
Take care and study hard.
G
Dude ..
Every time u see a Govinda Movie , do u write to David Dhavan telling him the feasability of the heros actions and gaps in the plot ???
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