If only ...

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"We'll be saying a big hello to all intelligent lifeforms everywhere... and to everyone else out there, the secret is to bang the rocks together, guys!"
~Hitchhikers Guide
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That’s it , bang them stupid rocks , discover fire , convert everything combustible into Carbon mono oxide ,chop down all the trees ,make automobiles, create traffic jams, invent RDX and when there is nothing else left to do , suicide bomb the shit out of each other ...So much better than rolling naked in a green field under the sun all day long without giving a damn about year end bonuses or huge ass education loans... No need to do that when you can spend your afternoons watching reruns of Seinfield...Its times like these that make me proud of what my species has done to make life so much more comfortable and meaningful...
Talking about meaningful, this weekend was definitely not one ... Mind numbingly boring RGV movie, Ps incessant khaptipana in the middle of a traffic jam and G's big lecture on the faults of my binomial decision making model... I am so glad the stupid weekend is over and I am back in the safety of my office away from all the raging maniacs...

For starters, I was woken up at 8:30 on Saturday morning and dragged to a Cineplex to watch Shiva ... O.K so RGV has made some slick interesting movies, but after this , I think the censor board should take away his license for making movies ... The actors couldn’t act, singers couldn’t sing ,Miss Kothari couldn’t expose and the audience couldn’t even sleep in peace coz all the actors had surprisingly shrill and irritating voices ...

On my way back, G told me not to take 1,0 decisions... By the time I could figure out what the psycho Freud wannabe was talking about, he told me that he didn’t approve of me making go/no go decisions and said that sometimes we need to live in the grey areas and give people the benefit of living there too ... I really hope he stops reading Herman Hesse and financial engineering textbooks ... He tends to combine the two to formulate theories which are way too complicated for me to understand... although deep down, I knew what he was talking about ... Sorry dude .. no can do ...

P is in town ... so being the good friend that I am, I spent most of Sunday running around town getting paperwork done for his wife to be's visa application ... As a further proof of my good friend ness, I decided to take him out for a couple of drinks at out of the blue ... As luck would have it , it was the last day of the Bandra fair... This meant the two of us were stuck in a traffic jam inside a car for over an hour ... P being the khapti that he is started complaining about traffic in India , roads in India , fairs in India and of course the biggest problem in India - Me ... while he was ranting on and on about how I should have known about the jam and chosen someplace else , I decided to leave the car and take a walk in the crowd ... By the time I got back , he pointed to some arbit building and claimed it to be the Mount Mary church ... I told him that it wasn’t , but the khapti wouldn’t listen ... He said that since the building looked like a church and had a giant wheel in front ,it had to be ... I tried telling him that I have seen the Mount Mary church many times and I know where it is , but obviously that wasn’t reason enough to doubt his "superior" direction sense and general awareness ... I was about to throw him out of the car, but the traffic cleared and we reached Out of the Blue .. He wasn’t too happy with my choice of the venue either and made it absolutely clear that it wasn’t a place to go for a boys night out... He then went on to declare that I should be penalized for all the fuckups of the day and hence should pick the tab while he stuffed his face with Cajun chicken and drank beer by the gallons ... Well what’s a lil tantrum throwing and extortion between friends ... Not my first time ...

I know I am being unreasonably bitter here ... Don’t get me wrong ... I love my friends and given a chance I would do the whole thing again ,but then had that jackass not banged those two rocks ,I would have spent my entire weekend rolling naked on a grass field under the sun...If only he wouldn’t have banged the damned rocks…